I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
