so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize