I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
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