sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Randomize
