So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
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