Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Randomize
