just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize