Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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