I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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