I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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