So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Someone came in the potted fern
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Is her dick bigger than yours?
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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