I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
