I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
We got so high we made milksteak
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Randomize
