I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize