Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
