Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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