Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
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