i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
