Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
