And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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