Welp...herpes.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Actions speak louder than pants.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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