The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step