It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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