I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Randomize