i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Success! We fucked roommates!
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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