You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
worst night to have a conscience
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Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
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I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived