My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
