Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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