Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
