You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
