he puts the penis in happiness.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
