Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
i think i have herpe
just one?
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
