There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
