More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
