is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
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