This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
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