I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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