The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
