Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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