Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
birth control should be required to get into college
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
