Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize