Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize