Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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