i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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