erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
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