how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize