i already hear my dad disowning me
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize