Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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