This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Randomize
