he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
It's official drugs can't kill me
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
You're breaking my sexual little heart
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Randomize